i tried to watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind this weekend. i made it 22 minutes of 107. the basic premise is a couple who decides to have their memories of each other erased when their relationship fails. a novel idea. one that was first written about by alexander pope, where forgetfulness is the only comfort one can take when love turns sour.
i wonder if this technology was available today, if i would go for it. i doubt it. bottom line, i’m chicken shit. because without those years to remember, who am i then? that’s the question i’m most fearful of answering. would i be lost without those memories? because in those 22 minutes i watched, those characters seemed genuinely lost, without direction, without vision, without sound. i’m already having a hard time with all those, WITH my memories; sans memories, i think i would drown from all the watery air that seems to seep thru me lately.
the main thing that i remember about the movie (jesus, it was only just last night that i saw it!) is the train. at the beginning-ish, they’re riding on the train, it’s near empty, just two people and somehow she migrates to where he sits, looking out the window at the passing scenery. i don’t know what they’re saying, i don’t even care. because i’m envisioning myself sitting on a train and taking it further than i needed it to take me, maybe even until it ends. that’s how i feel sometimes, it’s what i wish for sometimes, just to leave and possibly not come back.
but i hate not finishing something that can easily be completed, unless it’s a shitty ass highly acclaimed movie where the characters need to shower.