of late, failings

most of the things that flit around in my head theoretically would make good posts, if i were a better writer, capable of capturing that feeling, that emotion, that moment i want to capture in time. then it passes me by, i attempt at a draft and then i realize that it’s much funnier/wittier/better/relevant in my head and not so much in words. don’t you hate that?

i’m not interested in whining (tho i sure do it often in Real Life) here, nor do i want it to be a love fest about dw (tho i will unabashedly tell you that i am very much in love & dw is the best person i have ever met), and there is only so much i can say about my running (tho i did run a mile yesterday, and my body hates me today).

  • i signed up for another half marathon, in october. seems that i’ve forgotten how painful the run was, how i cried at various miles. instead, all i remembered was the glory of finishing, the cool medal on a cheap piece of ribbon around my neck. maybe it’s like child birth – you don’t recall the pain of pushing, until you’re doing it for the 2nd time, wondering why in the hell you signed up for this shit again, and then you’re done & all that pain is a vague memory that fades everyday until you make the conscious decision to do it once more. i say it often: we’re a foolish species.
  • i don’t follow my own advice – i tell friends to stretch before and after a run, to do cross training, to do intervals on the treadmill. all the while, i’m sitting on my ass playing bejeweled on the ipad.
  • i am still obsessed with young adult fiction and dystopian themed novels. i think i might be preparing for an Apocalypse, zombie or otherwise.
  • i have not paid much mind to my dSLR, or even the one my dear friend loaned to me so i could learn about videoing. when i do snap shots, i am displeased. dissatisfied. to the point of wanting to chuck the camera, as well as the blog aside.
  • i’ve blocked friends on my FB feed, some of them close, because the politics/religion/INANITY is getting to me.

however. breathe. sigh.

  • i attended my very first iftar recently.
  • a dear friend, JM, is on a path of healthy living, and he is doing couch to 5K with the intention of doing a 5k race with me in October. i am so proud of him. one day, after i’ve forgotten about training for this current half, i will run a half with him.
  • i’ve been lotionizing dw’s hands every night before bed. he has dry, chapped hands sometimes, to the point of painful cracked cuticles that bleed at the slightest touch. it’s a chore that he rolls his eyes at but now his hands are soft, still his, but not so much caked with dry blood.
  • i adopted two plants in my office. it’s a wonder to water them everyday and watch them not die.
  • i’ve been braiding my hair and wearing tutus in the house, i feel like an overgrown fairy princess. dw teases me and when he tells me to twirl, i happily oblige.
  • recently we had work done in a number of rooms, so we slept on the air mattress in the loft room. even after the work had been done we continued to sleep in the makeshift bed. it felt like being on a camping trip, i almost rigged a sheet tent for us to crawl into every night. i should’ve.

it’s already midsummer, is it weird that i’m thinking about autumn, wool scarves, elbow patched cardigans that are reminiscent of grandfathers?





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